Barack Obama is Dijon Mustard.
John McCain is Mayonnaise
Analysis of these candidates as condiments leads us to consider a daring new dream ticket:
EXCLUSIVE
WBYR, in an exclusive scoop, can report that John McCain will win the state of Utah and it’s five electoral votes. You read it here first.
The Teetotaler State, a key bulwark against Obama’s western strategy, delivers a decisive victory to McCain.
WBYR’s full run-down on the battleground states that remain too close to call is coming soon.
Developing…
The Colbert Report is shamelessly reusing my material. The cribbing starts 2:50 in.
Original here.
Months after the wheels came off of the bus, the horse that was lead to water finally drinks the kool-aid.
That’s right! This Saturday in Washington D.C. Hillary Clinton will bring America’s favorite mixed metaphor of a political campaign comes to an end. The question now is how will Hilary’s hard-core supporters, like her 197,255 MySpace friends, take the news? Will they come out for Obama in November?
To understand Hilary’s most dedicated supporters let’s take a look at who the campaign has chosen as her “Top 18” MySpace friends.
The data above suggests that Hillary herself makes up the vast majority of her support, with sweaty (hard working!) guys in argyle sweaters rounding out the demo.
This suggests that to win over these Hillaryland dead-enders Obama would have to consider offering Hillary the VP slot, and formulate a plan to combat the rising cost of dry cleaning.
(Hat tip Michael)
One post, 5,600 page views (thx digg!), and 1 joke stolen by late night tv.
Truly a day of milestones for this young blog.
McCain and his magic green screen makes an appearance on the Colbert Report 21 hours after you saw it on WBYR. I’ll post the video when it’s online.
Until then, the wit and wisdom of Hilary Clinton.
The general election began last night with John McCain and Barack Obama engaging each other on the other’s turf.
Sen. Obama spoke at the Xcel Center in St. Paul where John McCain will accept his party’s nomination this fall. Earlier that evening Sen. McCain inaugurated his general election campaign playing to the youth vote by jumping onto a popular internet trend: the green screen challenge!
Yes, that green backdrop is not just aesthetically disastrous stagecraft, it allows McCain’s savvy young supporters to “remix” the speech by inserting his message of tested leadership into fanciful new situtations.
The campaign is already flooded with submissions. Here’s an early favorite.
Obama, your move.
